December 2, 2014
Santa Goes Modern – Santa’s Internet Helpers
Contributed by
Gail McPike
and Toni Hall
Despite a combined total of close to 30 years in our lovely QCA environment, Santa’s magic book has us listed under, “Oklahoma, USA: Nice Girls.” That’s the way Santa used to roll back in Eisenhower years.
Younger readers will be shocked to learn, Santa and his North Pole team didn’t have a computer back then. For that matter, nobody did. Well, almost no one. Current Trophy Husband Frank, a proud Computer Engineering graduate of the University of Illinois, always reminds us of ILLIAC One. So in lieu of his normal stocking stuffer, we’re going to allow him 70 words or less on the ILLINI and computers. Take it away Frank…
“The first digital computer was designed and built in Champaign, Illinois in 1952. To give you an idea of the computing power of the day, the Government calculated the orbit of the Russian Sputnik on this machine in 1957. It contained over 2,800 old time “vacuum tubes” and weighed over five tons. It cost millions to make back when millions was a lot of money.”
Based on this little gem of a historical note, we can only assume that dear old Santa was operating on a paper-based record keeping system through the 1980s.
Where were we? Oh yeah, Nice (not Naughty) girls listed in Santa’s Oklahoma registry. Back in those days, Santa being an ‘old school’ guy, listed their name in ink. Once identified, the cute little Gail and Toni types were added to the list, somebody checked it twice and notations were made on the Naughty or Nice part.
After a short visit with the Jolly One down at the mall, we wanted to give you an update. Santa has not only moved into the modern age, he’s totally onboard with the whole internet thing. Santa has even set up an auto-response center where the elves will instantly turn out a letter back to you and the kiddos in your life. For example, Santa referred us to this one location: http://www.aletter4santa.com/
We filled in what we wanted and shared a few thoughts about our behavior. Pushed the send button and just as old Santa promised got the following response.
Dear Gail and Toni,
I am very happy to receive your letter. The Christmas elves have been very busy this season making wonderful new things for you. It’s been very cold here at the North Pole, and Mrs. Claus has been keeping me warm with lots of hot chocolate.
I think you may not know just how good you’ve been this year. There’s still time yet to keep up the good work. I’m proud of you! I know you’ll continue to be good girls.I will check with my elves to see about lots of yarn and some Bailey’s Irish Cream. And, I’ll check our inventory from last year for a knitting needles. We may not have everything, but I’ll see to it that you have great gifts under the tree. Don’t forget, I know when you’re naughty and when you’re nice so brush your teeth, do your chores, and be helpful to your family and friends. I’ll be dropping by on Christmas Eve!
Yours Truly,
Santa
All this delivered to our iPad, with just a few seconds response. Speaking of instant response, we found you can have an online text chat with Mr. Clause using this website. http://www.santabot.com/
CTH Phil sent Santa this message and this is what came back:
CTH Phil: My wife Toni has been Naughty
Santa: Santa maintains his naughty and nice list (now computerized, by the way), with the help of all the elves who keep track of each person — you probably aren’t even aware they are around you, but elves have a special way of keeping an eye on you. Sometimes if you look quickly enough you *might* catch one peering in a window or around a corner, but you would have to be very fast and very good!
You: Do you really like cookies
Santa: For real. What is not to like about COOKIES?
If you want to go whole hog, you can go directly to the North Pole with http://www.northpole.com.
This little website has the whole Christmas enchilada. Everything from recipes, activities and crafts for the Christmas Season.
As you can probably tell, we are waist deep in the Christmas Spirit. We can hardly wait till that big day. In the meantime, we are planning to head out to the Christmas Walk in the East Village. This year it’s going to be held on December 5 and 6. Santa will be there; so will Scrooge, The Grinch, Frosty the Snowman and Rudolph. But that’s just one of many activities. Geneseo will host their annual Christmas Walk on December 13. And if the past is an indication of the future, they have Chestnuts Roasting in the street.
We’ve got to sign off for now, but wanted to share our wishes for a great Holiday Season. See you next year.
