50+ Lifestyles

A ‘Good’ New Year

By Mary Schricker Gemberling

“The secret of being Happy is accepting where you are in life and making the most out of every day.”

-Anonymous

Whether you celebrated the first few moments or hours of 2017 with many friends or quietly with just one special someone, you probably did so by wishing them a ‘Happy New Year!’ But have you ever thought about what that really means?? Benjamin Bleich, in an article entitled, “What’s the best wish for a new year?” points out that Jews traditionally wish each other a ‘good new year’ rather than a ‘happy new year’.

“To hope for a happy new year is to focus on a culture whose greatest goal is ‘to have a good time.’ To seek a good year however is to recognize the superiority of meaning over the joy of the moment. Happy people simply focus on their joy from receiving benefits from others while people leading meaningful lives have a deeper meaning of joy from giving to others. In other words, meaning transcends the self while happiness is all about giving the self what it wants. This is not to say, of course, that you cannot have both a happy and good New Year! Happiness is often the byproduct of a meaningful life. Meaning should be our ultimate goal; in our pursuit of a good life we will discover the reward of true happiness!”

So what really makes us happy? This question has been the topic of many studies. Over five years ago, the 2011 United Nations General Assembly discussed the importance of happiness as a priority for global health and economic growth. Furthermore, scientific studies have established that the following eight things make us happy:

• Caring about other people. We all have something in us called the ‘moral molecule’, which is associated with both love and pain. This molecule releases high levels of oxytocin when we think about those we care for and love. Human beings need to feel love and connection through personal relationships in order to feel happy.
• Old Age. A 2014 study found that age actually has quite a bit to do with happiness. It found that people in their 70’s were far happier than 18-year-olds, because even though both age groups experienced extraordinary events, older people who had more life experience and knowledge about themselves could enjoy it more.
• The Five traits of positive thinking. Thinking positively vastly contributes to happiness. There are five key items that contribute to positive thinking, which in turn results in happiness; being grateful, being optimistic, practicing acts of kindness, relishing in how lucky you are, and using your strengths. It is being aware of these aspects of your daily life that positive thoughts will flow, providing for better well-being and overall joy.
• Exercise. When people work out endorphins, which are natural pain killers, are released creating feelings of euphoria.
• Enjoying culture. Stepping outside yourself and submerging yourself in the culture around you definitely contributes to happiness. Attending music performances, sporting events, and even church are all examples of activities that can make you happier.
• Having Pets. Studies have found that some of the happiest people around are those who have a pet. Pets not only increase our self-esteem, but give us a better sense of belonging and bring a deeper meaning to our lives.
• Volunteering creates feelings of greater self-esteem and psychological well-being which of course leads to happiness. In today’s society we are often under no obligation to help others, but that when we choose to do so we are going ‘against the strong dynamics of self- interest’, thus making us feel even happier.
• Not thinking too hard about being happy. When we focus too much on something we want, we sometimes forget to actually enjoy the things around us. While wanting to be happy is a good thing, it’s when we don’t let go enough to enjoy ourselves that we end up facing some obstacles to our happiness.

It is a simple fact that some people just seem happier than others. Everyone has a baseline level of happiness and a particular range in which it can rise and fall. About 50 percent of your happiness is genetically determined. You are hard-wired that way. About 10 or 20 percent is life circumstances resulting from things like age, health and occupation. That leaves at least 30 percent of our baseline happiness within our control. So even if you are born with a predisposition to think the glass is half empty, you can overturn that by the power of positive thinking. You might just have to try a bit harder than someone who is, so to speak, born happier!

I am certainly of that age where my life experiences have taught me that it’s a waste of time to be unhappy, or negative about most situations. It is far easier to have a positive attitude and look at the bright side of things. It takes 37 muscles to frown, and 22 muscles to smile. So why not smile; it conserves energy. But it’s more than that; it’s the whole attitude thing. According to Mayo Clinic, positive thinking helps reduce stress management and can even improve your health. Benefits from positive thinking and overall happier thoughts can lead to:

• Increased life span
• Lower rates of depression
• Lower levels of distress
• Greater resistance to the common cold
• Better psychological and physical well-being
• Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
• Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress

So as I think about 2017 and approach my seventh decade of living, what makes me happy? – Quiet moments with my husband; the laughter of my grandchildren; time in my garden; listening to the crash of the waves on a beach; a beautiful sunset; time with old & new friends; reading a good book; traveling to a new place; a good night’s sleep; riding my bicycle and last but not least writing.

My wish for you my reader is that you too find what makes you happy and have a really ‘Good’ 2017!

Mary, a former educator and Seniors Real Estate Specialist, is the author of three books, The West End Kid, Hotel Blackhawk; A Century of Elegance, and A labor of Love; My Personal Journey Through the World of Caregiving ( available at www.amazon.com )